Easter is always an emotional season for me. Now that He’s risen (indeed) it’s time to get off this roller coaster and settle into the contentment of budding perennials, blooming trees and be a seed that blooms. At 4 bells this morning, I had some random thoughts.
- That whole being in control (or not) thing – I get that. I know Who’s the Boss of me. What I have chosen to give up are a few things I could have control over but I’ve made the decision that I don’t want to die on that hill. The cost is too great. Que Sera, Sera.
- This was the first Easter without all of the kids at home. It was also the first Easter we ate dinner out at a restaurant. Though I was spared the horrors of ham, it just was not the same. I missed my 3 girls, my eldest, and my son-in-law terribly. My pity pot was trumped by my gratitude for simply having them in my life and seeing what God has done in theirs.
- One of my favorite things is digging in the dirt. Fresh, black earth and the power it has over a once-frozen root simply blows me away. I can’t wait to sow the seeds in my (sort of) garden. “Who plants a seed beneath the sod and waits to see believes in God.” Every seed to me is hope and faith.
- Sometimes your faith is tested and your hope is shaky at best. Then something happens that makes you slap yourself upside the head and tell yourself what a fool you’ve been to ever doubt. I shredded a whole hanging folder of someone’s tearful, shaky doubt this weekend. Literally. I probably should have kept it as a reminder in those dark times, lest I forget.
- Several things have thrown me into physical/nutritional reboot mode (see also: Easter restaurant food above). More exercise, more kale (etc), more lifting. I was a slacker last week, and I’m feeling it. Ron Burgundy got my bike all ready for the season, and I can’t wait to hit the trails. Even have my homemade power granola bars ready for the rides. Never underestimate the power of the properly fueled endorphin on your body, mind, and spirit. If I could package those little buggers in a pill, I’d be a gazillionaire. Sorry, folks. You have to work for those but they are totally worth it.
- I absolutely refused to see/read The Hunger Games until I read the posts by Katdish and then Amy Sorrells. (Yes, I still do read blogs on occasion. Rarely.) Now I’m intrigued. I’m taking the “absolutely” out of that equation and rethinking that whole stubborn R word. I won’t be that old lady who is inflexible and doesn’t listen to other peoples reasoning, especially when I haven’t read the book or seen the movie to make an informed decision about whether or not something is good, bad, or has redemptive qualities. If I hate it, I’ll bury that regret. If I don’t, I’ll be better for it.
- Sometimes people let you know that you don’t know squat. Praise God for real friends who are encouraging and edifying and keep your ego from being trampled by a herd of buffalo that are too big for their grumpy pants or who have the Cleopatra syndrome. They, my friends, are the Queen of Denial. I have so many IRL and online (i.e. “imaginary,” but not) friends, and they have blessed me many times over. You know who you are. Thank you.
- Sometimes dreaming about vacations you’ll never take can be pretty darn refreshing. And you get to skip airport security. Dream on.
- Continuing to live Alive. After all, when you are, why not live that way? Dying doesn’t mean you can’t still live. Thank you, Sara.